What I've been through

I am blessed with a good and loving husband. And he’s a good provider too… We started our marriage life with a good start. We have bought almost everything that we need to start a family. Then there comes the time that we have our first born. Oh yes, we still have that good start. We are able to give all the needs of our first baby. Then our second baby came. At first, it’s so hard for us because it brought us financial challenges and on my part emotional difficulties. But we never fight over financial issues. I and Reuel value our relationship more than anything. We always thought that all people have money problem even for rich people. So, it’s common to all. However, GOD is so good because that phase in our married life had easily come to pass because Reuel got an increase in his salary twice on that year, which is very rare to happen.
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So, financial challenges were settled but not the emotional part within me. I cannot say that I’m not happy with my life. I have a very supportive husband and two wonderful sons then. And almost every weekend, Reuel stroll us to the mall and we dine to our restaurant of choice. I’m always happy during the weekend but whenever Monday comes, there’s something in me that I cannot put into words or I don’t even know what exactly it is. But I’m always crying most of the day most especially in the morning when Reuel has gone to office to work and the children are still sleeping. I feel like I’m exhausted with my life and I’m praying to God to just take my life to end the heaviness that I always feel whenever I’m left alone. I love my two sons and I always spend time playing with them. I feel that emotional sickness when I’m alone or in the midst of doing my daily house chores routine.  But Reuel is always there for me love me more, to understand me and to give his moral support to what I've been going through.  He prays for me everyday that God would help me.

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Then, we commit ourselves to God’s work. I started to enjoy fellowshipping with our church mates especially to mommies like me. And I realized then that I’m so blessed with my life because I found that some may have more difficult challenges than what I have. That was the start when I really enjoy my life. And I start putting all my worries and trust unto the Lord. My very first life verse that I’ve found in the Bible is in the book of John 14:1 which says:

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“Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.”
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Everything was ok, and we’re active doing Christ’s great work until I gave birth to our third child. My faith got shaken and becomes weak. I didn’t have time to pray and do my personal devotion. Then I met (in the net) again my former colleague, Diana. I read her blog and relate easily to what she’s been through. Then we instantly have that kind of connection that only mommies at home have. She’s the reason I start blogging again and she brings back the confidence in myself.